You must make lots of decisions when you’re expecting, from the color to paint the nursery to the items you want on your registry. Choosing a name for your little one ranks high among your long list of to do's. But what happens when expectant parents can’t agree on a baby name? Here's how to stop fighting over a baby name and start compromising to find a baby name you both love.

There are many reasons why expectant parents might not be able to agree on a name for their newborn. Couples can often be worried about choosing the “wrong” name, and have excuses that include everything from “that name reminds me of…,” to worrying about whether a name will be popular in years to come, or a name that is difficult to pronounce or spell. Whatever your reason for not being able to agree on a baby name, acknowledge what is holding you back and work towards a plan to find just the right name.

Give yourself enough time

Whether it’s looking through baby name books, searching on the web, or talking with family and friends about special names for your baby, get started on your baby name list early.  Once you and your partner have created your lists schedule a quiet time to sit down together to talk about the names you have chosen and why you have picked certain ones.

Listen to what your spouse is telling you instead of focusing solely on the names that interest you. Don’t dismiss your spouse’s interests in a specific name.  Work through your lists and eliminate names you both agree won’t work, helping to narrow down your choices. If you’re unable to reach an agreement right away, take a step back, and set a date to come back and discuss the remaining names on your list.

Passing down a family name

Handing down a family name and naming someone after a favorite grandparent or distant relative is common in many cultures and may be something that comes up when planning for your growing family.

If both of you have a family name you’d like to pass down, start discussing your desire for specific names early on, and explain why the name is important to you. You may also want to consider including a family name as part of a middle name. Who says you can only have one middle name? You can have two middle names to include two family members that are important to both parents.

Outside influences

Friends and family may be eager to share their opinions with you on baby names they are fond of. While it may be helpful in some cases to get outside opinions, avoid feeling pressured to choose a name based on another persons desires. Thank the family member or friend for their suggestion and let them know that ultimately it’s a personal decision that you will be making as a family. Some couples choose to keep the names they have chosen private, until baby arrives to avoid conflicts as well.

Finding solutions

You can try everything from flipping a coin, choosing a name from a hat, or having a baby naming party, in order to choose your baby’s name with as little conflict as possible.

Considering compromising with alternative spellings of names, nicknames, middle names, or choosing a name that has a specific meaning that is important to you as a couple and family. Practice saying and spelling certain names and allow yourself time to be comfortable with a name before choosing. You may want to keep a short list of names until after the baby is born and you’ve had a chance to see your little one for the first time. If you’re waiting to be surprised on whether you’re having a boy or girl, keep a list of names that might work for both sexes.

If after looking over your lists and allowing time for discussion you’re still unable to come to an agreement, remember that this is one of many decisions you’ll be making together as a growing family, and the decisions will only get more challenging as your little one grows up. Have a plan early on, and be respectful of one another’s choices.

It’s unlikely you’ll look at your baby years down the road and regret the name you have chosen. The love parents have for their child is there –- no matter what their name may be.

Check out these articles which are full of baby names for your baby girl or baby boy –you are sure to find one you both love.

Popular American Baby Girl Names and Baby Boy Names by State

Unique Literary Baby Names

Cool Baby Names

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