Happy2bme, I'm really shocked with that father! If mine did so I would hate him for the rest of my life - how dared he? I think that girl is now just afraid of him and having sex outside his view. Or am I wrong?

i agree sex is a beautiful thing but who is chatting on there sex is fun it makes people happy but use a condom.

When two teenagers crawl up the stairs and close the door, it's easy to understand what most likely is going on inside. So usually, the parent knows or has a feeling what they are doing when they swing the door open to their teenage son and his girlfriend. To pretend to be shocked, or to force a "I can't believe you!" is not the way to go. If you have previously given your offspring the talk, then they understand that you have the premonition that they are sexually active. It's easy for the parent to say, 'No, Don't do it.' But it's harder for the teenagers to quit what they have already started. At sixteen, it's kind of obvious that a boy and his girlfriend would start sexual behavior. Try not to be so shocked, try not to feel disgusted. It's normal, and you have always had that sinking feeling. I believe you do not have to buy condoms or other methods of control for your son or daughter, but tell them that if they're going to bother having sex, they might as well bother walking their ass to the store and buy it themselves.

I have had one of these experiences. I am a sixteen year old girl, and I was recently caught with my 15 year old boyfriend by his father. It was by no means gruesome or a 'bad catch'. My boyfriend noticed that the light turned onto the hallway and he lept up to shut the door. But of course, the father swung the door open to see me sitting on the bed in my bra, shirt in hand, and his son zipping up his fly. A pause from the father, and then he turned to me and said, "Pack your shit, your leaving."
I did gather my things to leave. There was in no possible thought of me arguing. My boyfriend and I sat in the dining room, waiting. After about a half an hour of silence, his father appeared. "You two are not old enough to be doing this. You have disrespected me in my house." He turned to his son and said, "We'll talk about this later." He paused, and then went into the garage. I could not look at him. The mother came home, and we tried to act as normal as possible. The night ended oddly. She was not told.
However, as I left the room to use the bathroom, a quick conversation from father to son occurred. Something along the lines of Not speaking of this because mother's day is coming up. We both do not know if this means that he is going to tell his mother after the holiday or not. Already, his mother does not like me. If she is told, she will forbid us to be with one another. I am in love with my boyfriend. True, honest love. We fell earlier than most people do, but it should not make any sort of difference. I am afraid to be separated from him.

We are both ashamed, and we both decided to become active because we knew we could trust each other if anything went wrong. I'm not sure what to do next.

I'm just giving you the usual scapegoat's point of view.

also, just to add:
My boyfriend is incredibly smart. He has a 4.0 and takes advanced classes. He knows where he wants to go to college and what he wants to be when he gets older. He has after school activities such as being a writer for the school newspaper and singing in a choir. He is well spoken and very intelligent. I am interested in art and music, but I want to go to school for interests in film editing. I am also a good student with an incredible work ethic.
I'm trying to make the point that you should never be shocked, no matter how wonderful your child is. We are both nerds. Intelligent, geeky, awkward and in love. We both understand the dangers of sexual activity. We are not engaging in sex until I get proper birth control, we are not basing our love on luck.
I want you all to see it from our side. The other side. I have come to love my body and my realize my beauty once being told so by my boyfriend. I have become confident and so has he. I hope I am not shunned from existance by his family. I am not just a factor of the day or an odd chapter in a book, I am a girl with feelings for their son. I do not want to be treated like my feelings don't play a part in this. And don't you believe that a boy with such intelligence and ideas that he would have the smarts to understand all of this, too?

thats true.
that is a positive of sex but i just dont think people under age should just go around randomly having sex.
another thing my sons girl friend is unbleivbly smart so i dont think anybody having sex young is dumb.

jordan. wrote:

QUOTE:
When two teenagers crawl up the stairs and close the door, it's easy to understand what most likely is going on inside. So usually, the parent knows or has a feeling what they are doing when they swing the door open to their teenage son and his girlfriend. To pretend to be shocked, or to force a "I can't believe you!" is not the way to go. If you have previously given your offspring the talk, then they understand that you have the premonition that they are sexually active. It's easy for the parent to say, 'No, Don't do it.' But it's harder for the teenagers to quit what they have already started. At sixteen, it's kind of obvious that a boy and his girlfriend would start sexual behavior. Try not to be so shocked, try not to feel disgusted. It's normal, and you have always had that sinking feeling. I believe you do not have to buy condoms or other methods of control for your son or daughter, but tell them that if they're going to bother having sex, they might as well bother walking their ass to the store and buy it themselves.

I have had one of these experiences. I am a sixteen year old girl, and I was recently caught with my 15 year old boyfriend by his father. It was by no means gruesome or a 'bad catch'. My boyfriend noticed that the light turned onto the hallway and he lept up to shut the door. But of course, the father swung the door open to see me sitting on the bed in my bra, shirt in hand, and his son zipping up his fly. A pause from the father, and then he turned to me and said, "Pack your shit, your leaving."
I did gather my things to leave. There was in no possible thought of me arguing. My boyfriend and I sat in the dining room, waiting. After about a half an hour of silence, his father appeared. "You two are not old enough to be doing this. You have disrespected me in my house." He turned to his son and said, "We'll talk about this later." He paused, and then went into the garage. I could not look at him. The mother came home, and we tried to act as normal as possible. The night ended oddly. She was not told.
However, as I left the room to use the bathroom, a quick conversation from father to son occurred. Something along the lines of Not speaking of this because mother's day is coming up. We both do not know if this means that he is going to tell his mother after the holiday or not. Already, his mother does not like me. If she is told, she will forbid us to be with one another. I am in love with my boyfriend. True, honest love. We fell earlier than most people do, but it should not make any sort of difference. I am afraid to be separated from him.

We are both ashamed, and we both decided to become active because we knew we could trust each other if anything went wrong. I'm not sure what to do next.

I'm just giving you the usual scapegoat's point of view.

This sounds like it was handled well. The father didn't irresponsibly close the door and let it continue or explode in an abusive rage. He broke things up and was calm enough to have a chat to his son and decide not to worry his wife, at least until later.

Your first paragraph was also quite true. A lot of parents are quite aware of what is happening under their noses and still let it happen only to react shocked or angry.
Again, people often say that it is impossible to keep horny teenagers apart. If that's the case, they're not even trying.
It's not hard to supervise your children and make sure they aren't engaging in precocious sexual behaviour. For teenagers to engage sexual activity in the home, a certain level of privacy is required. If you make sure they have insufficient privacy, it can't happen. At least it can't happen there. They may find another place to do it, but at least a parent can't be accused of being so oblivious that it happens under their roof. If the teenagers are underaged, start enforcing an open door policy on the bedroom while they have visitors. If they are daring enough to try something under those circumstances, start a tougher rule about no visitors of the opposite sex in the bedroom at all. And they certainly shouldn't be bringing lovers into the house when you're not there.