I love it Britt! Hope you get your big family someday (not too soon though!)

Good Luck

Hi Britt!
Thanks for your comment and have a nice day!

Dear Cyndi

Thank you, it totally helped and I'm very relieved that I got that feeling out of me.
So I spoke with my mom, and thank god she was excited to hear me It was actally very funny and SO weird! And after I spoke to my mommy, my two best friends came over and I talked with them a little more! What a day..it was all about boys boys boys...
I would just love to have kids, I mean right now! I got this baby boom, and I am 15! But I know I can't have them yet so I just content to dreaming.
So, last night I saw this beautiful and lovely dream! I was mother of five kids, 5 girls. And the names were so beautiful, too! And very unusual. Some of them I had never heard before. Catalina, Quintessa, Calla, Zofia and Calix! Do you think that it could be a sign Ok, I'm beeing maybe a little silly. But the names were very pretty, though! I could totally name my ki after them They were so sweet

I am so glad you talked to your mom! It always helps me to get something off my chest, even if I just use the other person as a sounding board and I get no advice Plus it opened up a whole new aspect in you & your mom's relationship. I am glad you also talked with your friends. I bet they have the same kinds of fears and insecurities that you do.
I am not too sure where you live or if you get the Lifetime channel, maybe you could even look it up online. There is this show on that is so great! It is called How to Look Good Naked, not as racy as it sounds. It shows real women who have self esteem issues (like us all) and how to see that they are beautiful, no matter the color, shape, size or flaws. I love it! It has made me look at the judgmental way I look at myself and realize my worth! I think every female, no matter the age should see it! Really puts things into perspective.
I know the feeling about wanting a baby NOW I have had that since before I was your age, luckily I was smart enough to suppress it. I know you are too and you will wait until you feel you would be the mom you want to be.
I LOVE the names!! They are so beautiful and original. Might be a sign, might just be your subconscious confirming your wishes, either way it sounds like a great dream and something to look forward to. You are not being silly about being happy about the dream. I would have woken up smiling to have had that dream too.

Thanks for the tip!

Btw I don't live in America, I didn't want to scare you, but I don't live int the US. Sorry for not telling you that earlier

Hey I got this pretty good idea! My daddy is not originally from the country where I've lived my whole life. And here it comes:
My dad always wanted to have a boy but got three lovely girls (and I think he wanted to have a boy partly becouse he was professional footballplayer, so he could make of he's own son a football star.

And I'm kind of sure, that my daddy knew pretty soon after we had born, that we'd become something else than footballplayers! Anyway now he's a great coach) So he told to me once (couple years ago when I was about 11) that he always wanted to have a boy when I asked him. And he told me he would name the boy Sandro, I don't know why. Well like I said, I got this grazy idea that when I'm big and feel ready to become a mother, I could maybe adopt a little baby boy from the country where my daddy comes! Or then if I have a boy, I could name him like with someother first name, and my daddy could call him Sandro! I don't know yet
But the place where my daddy comes, has also pretty much of poverty so I could give that child better home. Or at least better oppertunities. I don't want to think too much of myself! (Becouse I know, that even the family could be poor, there can be also very much love )
But anyway, I don't want to plan my life totally, 'cos I already have lots of "careerdreams" what I want to accomplish so I feel my life has planned totally!
I know that is a different thing, if they don't come true. But this is how I feel Do you think that's totally insane idea?

Enjoy your day!

Love Alina

You should save what you've written here and look at it in ten years. thats all i am going to say, because what i really want to say will get me kicked off this site i am sure.