hello everyone i just wanted to let my feelings out and be totally honest... im scared out of my wits about the second birth. I am currently 36 and a half weeks pregnant and already had a few false alarms so the birth is getting quite near and im sooo scared. my first birth was not a good experiance ,dont get me wrong , im sure none of u had a great time in labour but i suffered bad. alot of things went wrong and it was all out of my control. the doctors and midwives care was awful and i put in complaints to them,. they gave me and epidural, pethidine and vontousse without asking me if i wanted this , they didnt bother checking how much i was dialating and they popped my hand open with a needle while they were gossiping about tv. my hand hasnt been right since and i still have the scars.
theres a whole bunch of other things that went wrong and the only reason i got through it was because my beautiful little girl was put in my arms at the end so very worth it of corse.
im now on my 2nd pregnancy and ive had a loada problems with the pregnancy, muscles have come away in my back, my stomach muscles are very bad , i suffer from pre-ecclampsia and a number of other things so this has made me even more nervous about the upcoming birth.
I hope you dont think im feeling sorry for myself ,alot of woman have it worse than me i know and im gonna have a beautiful son at the end but im so nervous and just need some advice on how to cope and relax in labour and have a positive experiance . id be grateful for any advice thanks for reading xxxx

My first birthing expierence was horrible, but I am now pregnant with baby number 6.

I could go on and on about the numerous things that went wrong during delivery; anywhere from sending me home just to turn around an hour later and my baby was born with no beating heart, no one at the hospital believed I was going to have my baby and no one was there to catch him when he came out.


I changed Dcotor's and hospitals after that and every expierence has been great (except number 4 as my Placenta started to detach and I had my son 3 1/2 weeks early and they kept telling me all the blood was my "bloody show", he ended up getting his stomach pumped and I almost blead to death, none of which I found about until 2 days laters when I was being sent home).

I don't know where you live, but Doctor's where I live can NOT give you any epidural or anything else without MY consent. Even my husband can not tell the Doctor's to give me an epidural, it has to be me.

I would express your concerns with your doctor and the nurse as soon as you go to the hospital. Do NOT be affraid to ask for a different nurse. I have had to ask for a different nurse and the way I look at it, it is my body and my baby and if a nurse doens't like the fact that I don't like her, that is too bad.

If you don't stick up for yourself and how you want things to go, then you will be told what to do and have to live with the choice of not speaking up.

great advice from Shelby.

relax....breathe in thru your nose...out thru your mouth. Slow and easy. Take a pic of your daughter with you. Put the picture right where you can see it. Look at her while you are breathing and relaxing.It will be your focal point. I did this and would think to myself that my child was there watching me and I didn't want to lose control of myself in front of them.

Remember it is temporary and will be over soon. Good luck. Remember, each labor is different.

I too experienced the most awful labor and delivery with two of my babies at the same hospital. There was no way I was going to go through that again, so I did a little research and found a better hospital and Dr. My last labor and delivery was wonderful, the difference was phenomenal.
My advice to you would be to ask around, get different opinions from women with babies. I'm sure most would not mind being asked where they had their baby and how it went. You could also go to some great forums online and join a baby club in your area and get advice from them.
Well good luck, please let us know what you decide.

I too had a awlful delivery but that had nothing to do with the hospital or nurses so It was nothing compare to your or shelbys experience but I had to sign a form in order to get my epidoral! Or you planning on delivering at the same hospital? if so then you should check out a different one!

the most important thing for u to remember is this..
EVERY BIRTH IS DIFFERENT!!!!!
but knowing how stressed u r there are a couple things u can do to ease ur anxieties... 1st of all if u can help it try and have ur baby at another hospital or birthing centre and talk to them alot b4 the big day... but that may be a bit late at this stage... seriously tho..
relax chicky
its all worth it in the end